From the Times Tribune: http://thetimes-tribune.com/articles/2008/...1963573_fea.txt


Local couples join trend by asking family and friends to perform wedding ceremonies

BY PATRICE WILDING
STAFF WRITER
Published: Sunday, September 28, 2008
Updated: Sunday, September 28, 2008 10:34 AM EDT

For many couples, planning a wedding is about exercising freedom of choice in the ways they display their personal styles and preferences. As traditions evolve and options expand, brides and grooms have found themselves not only choosing members of their bridal party, but handpicking the officiant who marries them from among their friends and families.

Elizabeth Hughes, a Shavertown resident and former director of education at the Everhart Museum in Scranton, said her eyes were opened to the possibility of having a more personalized service after attending co-worker Anonda Bell’s wedding, in which a friend acted as officiant. When it came time to plan her own wedding, Ms. Hughes asked Ms. Bell, whom she described as one of her best and closest friends, to perform the vows.

“When I went to her wedding, I thought ‘It would be so nice, and so meaningful, to have a friend do it for me,’” Ms. Hughes said. “She’s really intelligent and quirky, and I had enough trust in her, I knew it would be how I wanted it to be.”

Ms. Bell gladly accepted the offer, and immediately began the process of becoming an ordained minister with the Universal Life Church Monastery (http://www.themonastery.org).

“She was really excited, and it’s a real honor to be asked to do something like that,” Ms. Hughes said. Her fiance, Eric Hunt, was equally thrilled with the idea.

“He was all for it,” Ms. Hughes explained. “Neither of us are actively religious, I guess you would say, so we wanted something that was semishort and nonreligious.”

The ceremony was a hit with those in attendance, many of whom remarked to the couple afterward that it was one of the most enjoyable weddings they had ever been to.

“It was really fun the way Anonda did it. She quoted feminists writers and brought a sense of humor to the wedding,” Ms. Hughes added. “It was really genuine. It really talked about what a marriage should be about.”

For Eileen Biel, serving as officiant in her sister’s upcoming wedding will allow the family to keep the ceremony comfortable and familiar, especially since the couple has decided upon having a destination wedding.

The Pocono Mountain School District teacher was approached by her sister, Marie, about presiding over the vows because she was intent on having a small family wedding.

“She had been hearing about it and read about it online, and she wanted something more intimate and a little more personal,” Ms. Biel said. “Most people prefer to have their local priest at home do it, but when you do a location wedding, you lose some of that (familiarity). It’s better than having a stranger do it.”

Ms. Biel, acting on the advice of a friend who had also been ordained through the Universal Life Church, said what came next was “a lot of reading and a lot of question-and-answer.” She also had to speak with a church representative over the phone and explain why she was interested in becoming a minister.

“A lot of people do it just to flash a credential around,” she explained.

Ms. Biel said she was careful to research the legality and authenticity of the title, and while it wasn’t as easy as she thought it would be, she believes anyone can do it.

“Churches are going by the wayside anymore. I think its an attempt to continue their ideals,” she said of the growing trend. This theory may not be far off, as declines in church attendance and funding may be counteracted by getting parishioners more directly involved in ceremonies, for which they usually offer a donation or pay a fee.

Since attaining the new title of the Very Rev. Eileen Biel, she has received several requests from others to officiate at their weddings.

“It’s a nice gesture if I could do it,” Ms. Biel said, “but I guess we’ll see how the first one goes before I start booking.”

Ms. Hughes agreed that having the ability to marry loved ones is a rare and unique gift. “It’s one of the happiest days, hopefully, of people’s lives,” she said. “So it’s not a bad gig.”